February 2012
6 posts
My brother's reflections on the Super Bowl
David: nothing makes me more happy then knowing that gisele and tom brady are unhappy
December 2011
7 posts
For those of you wondering, the least enjoyable movie watching experience is watching Fargo, while your mom cooks something one room over, and with every gun shot yells out ‘IS THAT HIS WIFE?”.
Stephen Merchant Moves From Gervais' Shadow to... →
Nine months ago (yep… in MARCH), I bought tickets to see Stephen Merchant do standup… figuring we would still be friends until the end of the year, Amir got on board… we both forgot for a while, but December crept up on us, and now we get to see Stephen Merchant talk about how tall he is NEXT WEEK! Amir- this is the end of our friendship. Hanukkah is going to be SO AWKWARD now.
October 2011
1 post
Puns about Pie
My roomie and I made an apple pie last night, and decided to invite our friend Jeff to eat some… he hasn’t responded to any of our pie pun emails…
Jacob: yes, jeff if you want come and drop on “pie”
Jacob: i have a “filling” it’s going to be good
Me: Yes Jeff, please “dough” come over for some pie.
Jacob: “crust” assured...
August 2011
1 post
Things that make the local news in Southold, Long...
Old woman died.
A guy got a DWI.
May 2011
3 posts
me:
Alex: hahaha
i only watch 60s-70s era musicals....
ON ICE
me: HA
i like my musicals like i like my whiskey... ON ICE
Alex: hahahahahahaha
best joke
you ever made
me: i feel like we should stop being friends... its only going to be downhill from here
Alex: probably true
April 2011
3 posts
March 2011
7 posts
Sandwich humor
Jed: I MADE MYSELF AN INCREDIBLE SANDWICH TODAY. IT WAS VERY AMAZING.
Me: Tell me more.
Jed: well you see
Me: this sounds like the begnning of the birds and bees talk
"well, you see, when a man loves a woman"
Jed: ha
no
Me: "he gets a fresh loaf of sourdough bread"
"and he slices it at medium thickness"
Jed: WHEN A MAN LOVES A SANDWICH, NOBODY CAN TELL HIM HES WRONG
Me: ah yes, the forbidden love
Jed: GIVE UP HIS BEST FRIEND, IF THE SANDWICH WANTS HIM TO
yours is the better joke
Me: bros before doughs
OOOOOOOOOOOOOH
February 2011
12 posts
Pavla: i dunno, lol fuckyeahdogs reblogged fuckyeahbostonterriers
lol embarassing sentence
Jacob Sloan and I started a new blog with our shitty bagel puns. Follow us!!
www.shittybageljokes.tumblr.com
No matter who wins this game, we’re really all winners with the black eyed...
– My brosef Dave
Nancy: totally
like on clueless where the dad makes his daughter highlight certain dates in the discovery
lol jk
Me: HAHAHAHA
Nancy: alicia silvenfeld
Me: alicia silverstone?
Nancy: nicole blumenstone
3 tags
Alex Iezzi made a music video for Big Troubles and IT IS AWESOME!!! <3 <3 <3
January 2011
6 posts
Law school is kinda like The Warriors
me: that bitch stole my seat
Arthur: oh, your seat got jacked!
me: HA
Arthur: lol
ok, this is war
we are taking back that corner
me: SERIOUSLY
i'll get here early on thursday
Does anyone know where Nicole and I can watch the...
You guys, this is serious. Where can we watch it?
One Man’s Losing Fight Against Ladies’ Nights- NY... →
“In 2007, the lawyer, Roy Den Hollander, filed a class-action suit against Manhattan nightclubs like Copacabana, China Club, Lotus and Sol, claiming that they discriminated against men by offering free or reduced admission to women on “ladies’ nights.” Mr. Den Hollander contended that these offers violated the 14th Amendment’s guarantee of equal protection under the law.”
There...
1 tag
December 2010
19 posts
My brother is a nerd
David: can we stop by my apt?
sam left a part of his xbox there
me: okey dokey pokey
mom is reading this im
so don't say anything incriminating.
me: mom thinks that you are talking in code.
David: if i wanted to talk in code i would say this
me: that "part of his xbox" means drugs.
David: if(x=1 && y = 2)for(int x = 0; x++).
echo string "I Hate my mom".
me: haha
i'm blogging that
title: my brother is a nerd.
David: no don't blog that exactly, that was combining two different programming languages!.
My brother just got back from Conan O’Brien’s holiday party. While he was pretty amped on how nice Conan is, we were both terribly disappointed that Andy Richter wasn’t there! He really wanted to tell Andy that Andy Richter Controls The Universe was such an amazing show! Here’s a great Any Richter clip that made me cry a little.